There are enough of them to deserve their own page now so here we go.

This is mainly for famous chicken quotes but if you have an really amusing quotes involving chickens from friends then feel free to send them in. Alternatively if you have soundbytes to match the quotes and sketches....

Henry Ford is quoted as saying: Business is never so healthy as when, like a chicken , it must do a certain amount of scratching for what it gets.

Henry IV apparently stated: I want there to be no peasant in my kingdom so poor that he cannot have a chicken in his pot every Sunday.

Victor Hugo, in Les Miserables wrote: At this moment the chicken voice of little Gavroche resounded through the barricade

Jake Blues (need I say where from?): Bring me four fried chickens and a Coke.

Willem Dafoe as Caravaggio in The English Patient asks: In Italy, there's always chickens, but no eggs. In Africa there's eggs, but never chickens. Who separated them?

Bottom, A classic sketch:

Richie: What about pin the tail on the donkey?
Eddie: We haven't got a donkey.
Richie: Well er, pin the tail on the chicken.
Eddie: We haven't got a tail.
Richie: Well pin the sausage on the chicken.
Eddie: We haven't got a chicken.
Richie: Well pin the sausage on the fridge.
Eddie: Or a pin.
Richie: Sellotape a sausage to the fridge.
Eddie: We haven't got a sausage.
Richie: Put a bit of Sellotape on the fridge!
Eddie: Not much of game is it.

Shia LaBeouf I have never heard of but loved the quote from Even Stevens: If a chicken had lips could it whistle?

Father Ted. Dougle on the ball as ever:

Dougal: You wouldn't have a lasagna or a chicken curry or something like that?
Garda: No.
Dougal: OK, then maybe I'll just have a bag of chips, and could I have a Fanta Orange as well please.
Garda: Do you know where you are? This is a Police station.
Dougal: Right, then in that case I'll just have the chicken satay and pilau rice.

The Good Life. Great out of context quote so I'll leave you guessing: Not unless the chicken jumped out of the oven and banged one.

Pinky: Um... I think so, Brain, but what if the chicken won't wear the nylons?

Kryten: 68250? But sir, surely that's impossible without at least one live chicken and a rabbi.

Lister: Well, it was better than being a chicken. I mean, you've seen the size of an egg. You've seen the size of a chicken's bum. I was trying to say, in chicken-talk, "For God's sake, give me an epidural."

Officer Barbrady: Keep your eyes peeled boys, someone's going to make love to this chicken any second now.

Jack O'Neill previously known as MacGyver: Hypnosis. You know, I'm not a big fan of that bark like a chicken, cluck like a dog stuff.

Mike McShane on Who's Line: Don't mess with the Neon Love Chicken!

Michael Palin from Full Circle: We appear to have caught the hotel by surprise. The menu features only Chicken Supreme and Chicken Milanese. I ask the waiter what the difference is. 'They are both the same thing,' he shrugs, 'Flattened chicken.' As another diner enters, the door frame falls on top of him, catching him a glancing blow on the back of the leg.

Michael Palin from Pole to Pole: Basil, detecting a sniff of homesickness, cheers me up with an account of a local festival he dropped in to see last night at which he witnessed the crowning of Miss Grape 1992. Her prize was 15 worth of chicken and a large fish.

Michael Palin from Sahara, obviously after far to much chicken: The special of the day is chalked up on a board. Rabbit with baked apple. The prospect of anything without chicken in it reduces me to near-slobbering hysteria.